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The
Black Rock City Bureau of Erotic Discourse (BED) is a team of
volunteers who gather each year at Burning Man to provide information
and education regarding rape and sexual assault on the playa.
We
present this information in a sex positive format, as we believe that
fun, safe play is best approached by learning to acknowledge and
express your own personal desires and boundaries, while respecting
those of others. As an
adjunct to the vital roles of the BRC Emergency Services, the Mental Health Branch
and the BRC Rangers, we feel that BED can be an important part of
helping individuals safely navigate the sensual environment of Burning
Man.
At Burning Man 2005, we took our commitment to increasing
sexual communication to the streets. There the Bureau of Erotic Discourse
(B.E.D.) led a series of fun, interactive, sex-positive workshops called
“Negotiating Sex 101: How to Get Laid at BurningMan.” The HeeBeeGeeBee camp was kind enough
to provide space for the workshops, and we had about 50 people attending each
one. Participants—who ranged across the spectrum of gender, race, age, sexual
orientation, and sexual predilection—learned about how to identify and express
their own desires and boundaries in a sexual interaction as well as how to ask
about and honor their partners' desires and boundaries. They learned the
problems with assuming sexual consent based on physical “cues,” including the
fact that many people freeze when they perceive their partner’s behavior as a
transgression of their boundaries, and the fact that people misread nonverbal
signals routinely. Participants therefore got the opportunity to practice a new
approach of negotiating sex verbally with others. They got to enact strategies
for how to make explicit consent sexy and fun.
Participants in the workshops also learned about what to do if someone is not
interested in honoring their sexual boundaries. They learned skills to thwart
those who would aggress against them, how to look out for one another at
Burning Man, and how to intervene gently to support their friends when they
believe they may be at risk. Finally, participants learned how to apply the
principles of sexual negotiation to the task of getting laid at BurningMan. Whoo-hoo! The feedback was quite
positive. We had a number of comments about how good it was to hear the words
about boundaries. We also heard a lot about shyness. We learned a lot, and we
want to try it again in 2006.
The “Negotiating Sex 101” workshops are a central part of what we do. However, there is so much more! In the ensuing years, we have continued to passionately work on several fronts. Thanks to cooperation from the Burning Man organization, a paragraph describing the dangers of sexual assault now appears in every Survival Guide. Women and men seeing our
port-a-potty posters know that Burning Man has a complete team of
crisis intervention workers to assist if anyone is victimized. In 2006-2008, B.E.D. was able to support two women who brought charges against a serial rapist who is now serving 10 years in a Nevada prison. Because of this trial, the Pershing County Sheriff's Department has instituted new and better guidelines for dealing with sexual predators arrested the Burning Man event. The Rangers, Mental Health Branch and Medical Team of Burning Man are all more aware and responsive to sexual assault victims. The overall culture is changing from embarrassed denial of the problem to a pro-active and coordinated professional response.
We at B.E.D. are proud of whatever small part we have in these monumental changes and will continue to work for a safer Burning Man experience for all!
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